Biruin mo na ang lasing pati na rin ang bagong gising

Nagkakapikonan na naman. Ika nga, different strokes for different folks, lalo na sa komedya. Merong napipika, merong tawa ng tawa, merong dedma, at merong dense. Siyempre, meron tayong dominant state. Por ejemplo ang ating tiyuhing bungisngis, ang tiyahing killjoy, ang pinsang walang kamuwang muwang, atbp. We can be in any of those modes depending on the hirit, korek? Now, since one man’s meat is another man’s poison. I will not be surprised if what I find funny, is not funny to some, but to those who do see where the joke is coming from, they will be as hysterical as I. Now the thing is, comedy can oftentimes be a landmine.. and in the Philippines can be, frankly, deadly. Particularly, if the joke is not seen as a joke, and is mistakenly interpreted as being very offensive and violates a principle someone is very strongly attached to (as if tama ang principle). This often results from humor that uses and masks the truth, to create incongruity or absurdity It is often said that truth/reality is stranger than fiction – and corollary to that, humor is funnier if it is TRUE. Dang, where did I pull that one out?

Do you remember the times when you tell a funny story that happened to you, and someone else who had experienced a similar funny story will say – “That is so true”? While the experience may have not been exactly similar – yet, there is a common thread, a common element of both having the same experience. This act of the listener, relating to what’s being said, allows the listener to relive the funny moment – in effect reliving the experience. The joke becomes twice as funny not just because of the premise of the joke, but also because you are seeing the joke through the lens of your own experience, which makes the joke better the second time around. For example, a practical joke you played on a friend is similar to the joke being narrated to you – it brings back memories of a friend and everything associated with that friend, and you laugh harderermatud pa ni lolo, di ba?

What has the truth got to do with the joke? Uhhhhh…. everything? The biggest role being played here is the one of self-deception. We tend to comfort ourselves when experiencing tougher times than usual, that things are just fine even though things seem kind of outta whack – that that’s how things are – it’s normal. Alam ng walang nagawa ang isang kandidato, binoboto pa rin, okay lang mabait naman. We indulge in self-deception.

Self-deception is a process of denying or rationalizing away the relevance, significance, or importance of opposing evidence  and logical argument. Self-deception involves convincing oneself of a truth (or lack of truth) so that one does not reveal any self-knowledge of the deception. (Wikipedia).

It has been theorized that humans are susceptible to self-deception because most people have emotional attachments to beliefs, which in some cases may be irrational. Some evolutionary biologists, such as Robert Trivers, have suggested  that deception  plays a significant part in human behaviour, and in animal behavior, more generally speaking. One deceives oneself to trust something that is not true as to better convince others of that truth. When a person convinces her or himself of this untrue thing, s/he better masks the signs of deception.

This notion is based on the following logic: deception is a fundamental aspect of communication in nature, both between and within species. It has evolved so that one can have an advantage over another. From alarm calls to mimicry, animals use deception to further their survival. Those who are better able to perceive deception are more likely to survive. As a result, self-deception evolved to better mask deception from those who perceive it well, as Trivers puts it: “Hiding the truth from yourself to hide it more deeply from others.”

In humans, awareness of the fact that one is acting deceptively often leads to tell-tale signs of deception, such as nostrils flaring, clammy skin, quality and tone of voice, eye movement, or excessive blinking. Therefore, if self-deception enables someone to believe her or his own distortions, s/he will not present such signs of deception and will therefore appear to be telling the truth.Self-deception can be used both to act greater or lesser than one actually is. For example, one can act overconfident to attract a mate or act under-confident to avoid a predator or threat. If a person is capable of concealing her or his true feelings and intentions well, then s/he is more likely to deceive others and succeed.

It may also be argued that the ability to deceive, or self-deceive, is not the selected trait but a by-product of a more primary trait called abstract thinking. Abstract thinking allows many evolutionary advantages such as more flexible, adaptive behaviors and innovation. Since a lie is an abstraction, the mental process of creating a lie can only occur in animals with enough brain complexity to permit abstract thinking. Self-deception lowers cognitive cost; that is to say, it is less complicated for one to behave or think in a certain manner that implies something is true, if s/he has convinced her/himself that that very thing is indeed true. The mind will not have to think constantly of the true thing and then the false thing, but simply convince her or himself that the false thing is true.

For short, self-deception is the path of least resistance. It is the easy way out. No need to use your brain. Just believe that the false thing is true – PERIOD.

Another theory of humor is the incongruity theory which states that

humour arises when the seemly and logical disappear and things that do not normally go well together appear. The child who places a toy cat in the cat basket and heads off to the vet can bring about intense laughter. This occurs when certain situations do not go well together. It suggests that something doesn’t belong here. Laughter, as a social signal warns others about this. Thomas Veatch offers a more scientific explanation of this:Veatch’s Theory of Humor Thomas Veatch’s Theory of Humor states that in order for something to be perceived as humorous, there are three elements that need to be present:

There is a perception that something is wrong – there is a violation of what should be.
There is a prevailing perception that the situation is, in fact, normal and okay.
Both N and V are present at the same time – “okay” and “not okay” are present in the perceiver’s mind at the same time, resulting in an incongruity.

Tom Veatch defines humor by saying, “humor occurs when it seems that things are normal while at the same time something seems wrong.”


The thing is  what happens to the Truth Theory of Humor when a person with a false immovable belief meets another person with an unstoppable reality-based joke?

What if the three elements of the incongruity theory are not met?

Exactly! Mismo! Pikonan blues! Sapakan! Bakbakan! Tadyakan! Saksakan! Barilan! Ubusan ng Lahi! Rido! Massacre! Assasination, etc – the easy way out pa rin.. na naman, na pud, na sad, usab, again

The phrases ambot sa langaw pilay edad sa uk-ok (ewan ko sa langaw anong edad ng ipis), baho ka ug ilok  (mabantot ang kili-kili mo), baho ka ug tiil (mabaho ang paa mo), baho ka ug baba (mabaho ang bunganga mo), unswa virgin imong lola (ano kamo virgin ang lola mo) – evokes laughter between friends – but can be offensive to the uninitiated. Worse, if one of those were true – like you have putok sa kili kili because you  don’t use tawas and believe that the scent of your sweat is so… macho, like the smell of tuba siete-biernes (tuba fermented for seven weeks). I can either be embarrassed and get angry because I was … duhhh….embarrassed and demand an apology, my B.O. notwithstanding.

Guess what happens next? People don’t talk about it in front of you – but when you are not around, you become the butt of jokes. That’s okay – what you don’t know wouldn’t hurt you right? To be fair, it might or it might not. B.O. however is a reflection of sanitary habits, of education, of attention to detail, of capacity to care – it can affect your career, your reputation, and ultimately your self-image as more people shun away from you because you stink. Guess what Philippines, if we think we have arrived because we can demand an apology, think again. We have shot ourselves in the proverbial foot.

So how should this be treated? Beats me, don’t take my advice – I suck at it. But, if you insist, One way is to ignore it. Another way is to change the belief, seek the truth, and act accordingly – use tawas so that when the joke is told again, I can go with the flow and laugh at the joke without an ounce of feeling offended.

Styles of Comedy

Which brings us to the matter of style. There are styles of comedy which have more appeal to Da Pinoy. Will you be able to recognize which ones have more appeal to Da Pinoy? How about you what’s your preferred style of comedy? Hold your horses, I have not forgetten the styles, here goes the list (courtesy of

Types of Comedy

Anecdotes: When I think of anecdotes I think of my friend Benny, who always has a hilarious story to tell whenever I meet him. Anecdotes are nothing but narration of interesting humorous events, which can be used to make the audience laugh. This is a very popular type of comedy.

Banter: The person that comes to my mind when I think of this form of humor is Chandler Bing from the sitcom Friends. Well, Matthew Perry has everyone rolling on the floor with laughter for sure! What can be funnier than passing witty remarks and indulging in some harmless teasing? Banter is a form of comedy that includes all this and much more!

Blendword: Have you ever tried combining two words to make a completely innovative and funny word? Blendword comedy is nothing but the creation of funny words by blending two or three words.

Blue Humor/Off-Color Humor: Humor can be added to almost any topic under the sky. Well, if you are looking for some material to amuse a large audience, this might not necessarily be the genre that you should pick! There is a thin line between blue-humor and vulgarity. Blue humor is based on subjects like body parts or sex. (Ang laki ng ilong mo, parang talong. You have strong jaw lines para kang si babalu. Ang sexy mo, parang Coke.. litro nga lang)

Blunder: This is a genre of humor, which involves a character or a comedian making foolish mistakes, which seem humorous to others. There is one person who personifies this genre in humor and although I am not a great fan, he is quite popular for his blunder-comedy – Rowan Atkinson as Mr. Bean. (Whaddya know, Mr Bean is a top show in Phil primetime)

Burlesque: This is a form of satire, since Burlesque comedy involves ridiculing any basic style of speech or even writing. Burlesque is theatrical entertainment of broad and parodic humor, which usually involves comic skits. It is said to have originated from the Italian Commedia dell’arte.

Black Humor/Dark Comedy: Black humor or dark comedy often refers to the juxtaposition of morbid and farcical elements to create a disturbing effect. Black comedy, is a sub-genre of comedy and satire where grave topics like death, rape, murder, marital affair, human annihilation or domestic violence are treated in a satirical manner (Andres de Saya)

Commedia dell’arte: Commedia dell’arte is an Italian style comedy of the 16th to 18th centuries improvised from standardized situations and stock characters. Commedia dell’arte includes themes like adultery, jealousy, old age, and love. Many of the basic plot elements of Commedia dell’arte can be traced back to the Roman comedies of Plautus and Terence, while some of these were translations of lost Greek comedies of the fourth century BC.

Caricature: Caricature involves exaggerated portrayal of a person’s mental, physical, or personality traits in wisecrack form. Caricatures can be insulting, complimentary, political or can be drawn solely for entertainment too. (Adam Carolla, Dave Chapelle, Carlos Mencia, Larry the Cable Guy, Stephen Colbert, John Stewart, Jo Koy, Edwin San Juan, Rex Navarette, Donya Buding)

The Catch Tale: Not everyone would be up for this sort of humor. A catch tale is basically a funny story that messes up the reader or listener by implying an awful ending and then stopping with an abrupt declaration. (Carolla?)

Conundrum: This is like a humorous one liner word puzzle that can’t be solved because the answer is a pun.

Freudian Slip: A Freudian slip is nothing but a funny statement, which seems to just pop out from the comedian, but actually comes from the person’s subconscious thoughts. This is just like funny things said unintentionally owing to slip-of-the-tongue. The name Freudian slip is coined after the father of psychology – Sigmund Freud.

Farce/Travesty: A comedy characterized by broad satire and improbable situations is termed as farce or travesty. A farce is a comedy style, which aims to entertain the audience by means of unlikely, improbable and extravagant situations, disguise and mistaken identity, verbal humor of varying degrees of sophistication. It can include sexual innuendo and word play, or a fast-paced plot whose speed usually increases, culminating in an ending that often involves an elaborate chase scene. Farce is also characterized by physical humor and the use of deliberate absurdity or nonsense.

Gallows Humor: Gallows humor is a type of humor which arises from traumatic or life-threatening situations such as wartime events, mass murder, hostilities or in other situations where death is impending and unavoidable. This genre is similar to black comedy but, the only difference is that the comedy is created by the victim.

High Comedy: High comedy refers to a sophisticated comedy, often satirizing genteel society.

Irony: Irony is a trope that involves incongruity between what is expected and what occurs and hence is a popular type of humor. Irony is portrayed through words or actions to express something completely different from the literal meaning.

Melodrama: Melodramatic comedy is an extravagant comedy in which action is more salient than characterization.

Nonsensism: Well, the term is pretty self-explanatory, isn’t it? Nonsensism includes any kind of funny nonsense, absurdity without realistic logic. (Battle of the Brainless, Wowowee)

Parody: Parody is defined as a work created to mock, comment on, or poke fun at an original work, its subject, or author, by means of humorous or satiric imitation. Parody is nothing but a composition that imitates or misrepresents somebody’s style, in a humorous way. (Ispup)

Practical Comedy: A practical joke or prank is a stunt or trick to purposely make someone feel foolish or victimized, usually for humor. Since pranks or these practical jokes are designed to make people feel foolish or victimized, there is an inherent undertone of cruelty in most practical jokes.

Recovery: Recovery is a combination of blunder and wit, which means that the comedian or the character usually creates humor by making an error, and then saving himself with a fast and witty comeback.

Repartee: Witty comebacks, clever replies and droll retorts are all comic repartees.

Switching: This type of comedy involves changing the main parts of a story, such as the punch line to create humor.

Satire: Satire is defined as a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody’s face but their own. Satire is a branch of comedy, which makes use of witty language to convey insults or scorn. In satire, human or individual vices, follies, abuses, or shortcomings are held up to reprimand by means of ridicule, burlesque, derision, irony, or other methods. Although satire is usually meant to be funny, the purpose of satire is not primarily humor, but an attack on something or some subject the author strongly disapproves of. (Adam Carolla, Dave Chapelle, Carlos Mencia, Larry the Cable Guy, Stephen Colbert, John Stewart)

Seriocomedy: A comedy with serious elements or overtones is known as seriocomedy.

Stand-up Comedy: Another type of comedy is stand-up comedy, which involves a comedian standing up in front of a crowd and amusing them with jokes and funny stories. There are several noted stand-up comedians, for e.g. Jerry Seinfeld. (Adam Carolla, Dave Chapelle, Carlos Mencia, Larry the Cable Guy, Stephen Colbert, John Stewart, Jo Koy, Edwin San Juan, Rex Navarette, Donya Buding)

Sitcom: Situational comedy, commonly known as ‘sitcom’ is a popular type of comedy. A humorous drama based on situations that might arise in day-to-day life. There exist a large number of popular TV sitcoms, which are synonymous with this type of comedy.

Slapstick Comedy: Slapstick humor is a boisterous form of comedy with chases, collisions and practical jokes where people just do silly things such as tripping, falling over or embarrassing themselves just to make people laugh. Noted comedian Charlie Chaplin who acted in the silent movies, used a lot of slapstick comedy. (Dolphy, Chiquito, Panchito, Redford White,Tito, Vic, and Joey, Iskul Bukol, etc)

Wisecrack: A witty remark about a particular person or thing that is thrown in at a perfect timing, at the spur of the moment, is known as a wisecrack.

As far as jokes are concerned, we know that there are several types of jokes like Political Jokes, Relationship Jokes, Blonde Jokes, Business Jokes, Dating Jokes, Entertainment Jokes , Gender Jokes, Lawyer Jokes, Office Jokes and many more. (tulad ng Joke joke Bolante, o kagat ka naman agad)

Some jokes work with a certain audience. Some don’t. In media parlance – that’s refered to as demographic profile, shortened to demographics.

Demographic ProfileMarketers typically combine several variables to define a demographic profile. A demographic profile (often shortened to “a demographic”) provides enough information about the typical member of this group to create a mental picture of this hypothetical aggregate. For example, a marketer might speak of the single, female, middle-class, age 18 to 24, college educated demographic.

Marketing researchers typically have two objectives in this regard: first to determine what segments or subgroups exist in the overall population; and secondly to create a clear and complete picture of the characteristics of a typical member of each of these segments. Once these profiles are constructed, they can be used to develop a marketing strategy and marketing plan. The five types of demographics in marketing are age, gender, income level, race and ethnicity.


My point being? That Adam Carolla, Chip Tsao, Teri Hatcher – had the right message that, by virtue of mass media, unfortunately reached the wrong demographic profile. A joke that uses satire that can be taken quite well by a demographic profile such as the one below

  • 37% have 4+ years college
  • 49% white collar, professional, managers
  • Have a median household income of $81,110
  • 56% own their home
  • 87% own a personal computer
  • 88% access the internet
Technologically savvy:

  • 78% own a personal computer
  • 74% access the internet

  • 61% Male; 61% Female
  • 67% A18-49
  • 62% A25-54

But, the same joke can be received differently by a viewing audience whose viewing preferences are shown in the comparative ratings of ABS-CBN and GMA-7 on March 5 to 8, based on the overnight ratings of Taylor Nelson Sofres (TNS) from a survey of national households.



Umagang Kay Ganda (ABS-CBN) 5.9%; Unang Hirit (GMA-7) 4.2%
Mr. Bean (ABS-CBN) 5.7%; Hunter X Hunter (GMA-7) 5.7%
Gintama (ABS-CBN) 6.9%; Pokemon Master Quest (GMA-7) 6.6%
Naruto Shippuuden (ABS-CBN) 8.3%; Dragon Ball GT (GMA-7) 8.6%
Melason in Love (ABS-CBN) 11.7%; Knock Out (GMA-7) 8.8%
Showtime (ABS-CBN) 21.7%; Diz Iz It! (GMA-7) 6.7%
Wowowee (ABS-CBN) 24.6%; Eat Bulaga! (GMA-7) 13.5%; Daisy Siete: Bebe & Me (GMA-7) 11%
Magkano ang Iyong Dangal? (ABS-CBN) 14.8%; Gumapang Ka Sa Lusak (GMA-7) 11.7%
Maria de Jesus: Anghel Sa Lansangan (ABS-CBN) 12.3%; Ina, Kasusuklaman Ba Kita? (GMA-7) 12.7%
Banana Split Daily Servings (ABS-CBN) 10.8%; Wow Hayop (GMA-7) 5.9%
Pilipinas Got More Talent (ABS-CBN) 11.6%; You’re Mine Only Mine (ABS-CBN) 13.1%; Family Feud (GMA-7) 8.9%


Tanging Yaman (ABS-CBN) 23%; First Time (GMA-7) 14.5%
TV Patrol World (ABS-CBN) 31.9%; 24 Oras (GMA-7) 21%
Agua Bendita (ABS-CBN) 38.4%; Panday Kids (GMA-7) 24%
Kung Tayo’y Magkakalayo (ABS-CBN) 34.3%; The Last Prince (GMA-7) 25.3%
Habang May Buhay (ABS-CBN) 29.3%; Diva (GMA-7) 22.4%
Rubi (ABS-CBN) 24.3%; Queen Seon Deok (GMA-7) 19.4%
SNN: Showbiz News Ngayon (ABS-CBN) 14.5%; Bandila (ABS-CBN) 8%; Bubble Gang (GMA-7) 10.9%
S.O.C.O. (ABS-CBN) 6.9%; Saksi (GMA-7) 4.7%
Trip Na Trip (ABS-CBN) 2.5%; OFW Diaries (GMA-7) 1.9%

March 6, Saturday


Salamat Dok (ABS-CBN) 3.2%; Kapwa Ko, Mahal Ko (GMA-7) 1.1%; Ryukendo (GMA-7) 2.3%
Kabuhayang Swak Na Swak (ABS-CBN) 4.2%; Shonen Onmiyoji (GMA-7) 4.5%
Wanted Perfect Husband (ABS-CBN) 3.4%; Race-Tin Flash and Dash (GMA-7) 7.1%
Math Tinik (ABS-CBN) 4.1%; Art Angel (GMA-7) 7.1%
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Fast Forward (ABS-CBN) 5.5%; Chaotic (ABS-CBN) 6.3%; Happy Land (GMA-7) 6.6%
Busuo Renkin (ABS-CBN) 5.9%; Ka-Blog (GMA-7) 5.7%
Kulilits (ABS-CBN) 5.3%; Maynila (GMA-7) 6.4%
Showtime (ABS-CBN) 22%; Diz Iz It! (GMA-7) 6.6%
Wowowee (ABS-CBN) 26.3%; Eat Bulaga! (GMA-7) 14.5%
Entertainment Live (ABS-CBN) 11.6%; Startalk (GMA-7) 8.8%
Cinema FPJ: Da King on ABS-CBN (ABS-CBN) 15.1%; Wish Ko Lang (GMA-7) 9.1%


Failon Ngayon (ABS-CBN) 16.3%; 24 Oras Weekend (GMA-7) 10.6%
TV Patrol Sabado (ABS-CBN) 23.4%; Pinoy Records (GMA-7) 13%
Tonyong Bayawak (ABS-CBN) 29.3%; Bitoy’s ShoWWWtime (GMA-7) 14.3%
Pilipinas Got Talent (ABS-CBN) 34.3%; Kapuso Mo Jessica Soho (GMA-7) 16.5%
Maalaala Mo Kaya (ABS-CBN) 26.5%; Imbestigador (GMA-7) 16.5%
Melason In Love (ABS-CBN) 20.1%; Banana Split (ABS-CBN) 10.8%; The Bottom Line With Boy Abunda (ABS-CBN) 3.2%; Binibining Pilipinas 2010 (GMA-7) 12.1%
Sports Unlimited (ABS-CBN) 2.2%; Walang Tulugan With The Master Showman (GMA-7) 2.8%

March 7, Sunday


The Healing Eucharist (ABS-CBN) 4.1%; PJM Forum (GMA-7) 1.2%
Kabuhayang Swak Na Swak (ABS-CBN) 3.9%; In Touch With Dr. Stanley (GMA-7) 1.5%
Salamat Dok (ABS-CBN) 5.1%; Race-Tin Flash and Dash (GMA-7) 5%
Trollz (ABS-CBN) 6.3%; Ryukendo (GMA-7) 6.7%
Totally Spies Undercover (ABS-CBN) 7%; Team Galaxy (ABS-CBN) 7.9%
Chaotic (ABS-CBN) 6.5%; Zooperstars (GMA-7) 7.8%
Busuo Renkin (ABS-CBN) 6.4%; Princess Resurrection (ABS-CBN) 8.6%; Matanglawin (ABS-CBN) 12.5%; Panday Kids Marathon (GMA-7) 15.5%
ASAP XV (ABS-CBN) 15.8%; Eleksyon 2010 (ABS-CBN) 15.2%; Kapuso Movie Festival: Sundo (GMA-7) 17.8%; Diva Ang Unang Birit (GMA-7) 16.3%
Your Song Presents Love Me, Love You (ABS-CBN) 11.7%; Dear Friend: My Stalking Heart (GMA-7) 13.4%
The Buzz (ABS-CBN) 13.3%; Showbiz Central (GMA-7) 8.1%


TV Patrol Linggo (ABS-CBN) 23.3%; Kap’s Amazing Stories (GMA-7) 15.2%
Goin’ Bulilit (ABS-CBN) 29.4%; 24 Oras Weekend (GMA-7) 19.6%
Rated K (ABS-CBN) 34.3%; Mel & Joey (GMA-7) 16.9%
Pilipinas Got Talent (ABS-CBN) 39.1%; Bandaoke (GMA-7) 13.4%
Sharon (ABS-CBN) 25.5%; Show Me Da Manny (GMA-7) 15.5%
Sunday’s Best (ABS-CBN) 6.2%; SNBO (GMA-7) 9.3%
Urban Zone (ABS-CBN) 1.8%; Diyos at Bayan (GMA-7) 1.4%

March 8, Monday


Umagang Kay Ganda (ABS-CBN) 6%; Unang Hirit (GMA-7) 5.1%
Mr. Bean (ABS-CBN) 6.2%; Hunter X Hunter (GMA-7) 5.3%
Gintama (ABS-CBN) 7.1%; Melason In Love (ABS-CBN) 9.4%; Pokemon Master Quest (GMA-7) 7.1%
82nd Oscar Awards (ABS-CBN) 13.2%; Dragon Ball GT (GMA-7) 8%; Knock Out (GMA-7) 8.6%; Diz Iz It! (GMA-7) 9%
Wowowee (ABS-CBN) 21.6%; Eat Bulaga! (GMA-7) 15.2%; Daisy Siete: Bebe & Me (GMA-7) 10.2%; Gumapang Ka Sa Lusak (GMA-7) 10.3%
Magkano ang Iyong Dangal? (ABS-CBN) 13.6%; Ina, Kasusuklaman Ba Kita? (GMA-7) 9.7%
Banana Split Daily Servings (ABS-CBN) 10.9%; Pilipinas Got More Talent (ABS-CBN) 10.7%; Joey’s Quirky World (GMA-7) 6%
You’re Mine Only Mine (ABS-CBN) 14.5%; Family Feud (GMA-7) 8.4%


Tanging Yaman (ABS-CBN) 26.4%; First Time (GMA-7) 14.6%
TV Patrol World (ABS-CBN) 35%; 24 Oras (GMA-7) 23.1%
Agua Bendita (ABS-CBN) 39.2%; Kung Tayo’y Magkakalayo (ABS-CBN) 35.1%; Panday Kids (GMA-7) 27.1%
Habang May Buhay (ABS-CBN) 29.6%; The Last Prince (GMA-7) 25.6%
Rubi (ABS-CBN) 23.3%; Diva (GMA-7) 21%
SNN: Showbiz News Ngayon (ABS-CBN) 13.1%; Queen Seon Deok (GMA-7) 19.3% Bandila (ABS-CBN) 6.8%; Saksi (GMA-7) 9.3%
XXX (ABS-CBN) 5.1%; I Witness (GMA-7) 5.7%


March 5, Friday


1. Wowowee (ABS-CBN) – 24.6%
2. Showtime (ABS-CBN) – 21.7%
3. Magkano ang Iyong Dangal? (ABS-CBN) – 14.8%
4. Eat Bulaga! (GMA-7) – 13.5%
5. You’re Mine Only Miner (ABS-CBN) – 13.1%
6. Maria de Jesus: Ang Anghel Sa Lansangan (ABS-CBN) – 12.3%
7. Melason in Love (ABS-CBN) / Ina, Kasusuklaman Ba Kita? (GMA-7) – 11.7%
8. Pilipinas Got More Talent (ABS-CBN) – 11.6%
9. Daisy Siete: Bebe & Me (GMA-7) – 11%
10. Banana Split Daily Servings (ABS-CBN) – 10.8%


1. Agua Bendita (ABS-CBN) – 38.4%
2. Kung Tayo’y Magkakalayo (ABS-CBN) – 34.3%
3. TV Patrol World (ABS-CBN) – 31.9%
4. Habang May Buhay (ABS-CBN) – 29.3%
5. The Last Prince (GMA-7) – 25.3%
6. Rubi (ABS-CBN) – 24.3%
7. Panday Kids (GMA-7) – 24%
8. Tanging Yaman (ABS-CBN) – 23%
9. Diva (GMA-7) – 22.4%
10. 24 Oras (GMA-7) – 21%

March 6, Saturday


1. Wowowee (ABS-CBN) – 26.3%
2. Showtime (ABS-CBN) – 22%
3. Cinema FPJ: Da King on ABS-CBN (ABS-CBN) – 15.1%
4. Eat Bulaga! (GMA-7) – 14.5%
5. Entertainment Live (ABS-CBN) – 11.6%
6. Wish Ko Lang (GMA-7) – 9.1%
7. Startalk (GMA-7) – 8.8%
8. Race-Tin Flash & Dash (GMA-7) / Art Angel (GMA-7) – 7.1%
9. Happy Land (GMA-7) / Diz Iz It! (GMA-7) – 6.6%
10. Maynila (GMA-7) – 6.4%


1. Pilipinas Got Talent (ABS-CBN) – 34.3%
2. Tonyong Bayawak (ABS-CBN) – 29.3%
3. Maalaala Mo Kaya (ABS-CBN) – 26.5%
4. TV Patrol Sabado (ABS-CBN) – 23.4%
5. Melason in Love (ABS-CBN) – 20.1%
6. Talentadong Pinoy (TV5) – 18.4%
7. Kapuso Mo, Jessica Soho (GMA-7) / Imbestigador (GMA-7) – 16.5%
8. Failon Ngayon (ABS-CBN) – 16.3%
9. Bitoy’s ShoWWWtime (GMA-7) – 14.3%
10. Pinoy Records (GMA-7) – 13%

March 7, Sunday


1. Kapuso Movie Festival: Sundo (GMA-7) – 17.8%
2. Diva Ang Unang Birit (GMA-7) – 16.3%
3. ASAP XV (ABS-CBN) – 15.8%
4. Panday Kids Marathon (GMA-7) – 15.5%
5. Eleksyon 2010 (ABS-CBN) – 15.2%
6. Dear Friend: My Stalking Heart (GMA-7) – 13.4%
7. The Buzz (ABS-CBN) – 13.3%
8. Matanglawin (ABS-CBN) – 12.5%
9. Your Song Presents Love Me, Love You (ABS-CBN) – 11.7%
10. Princess Resurrection (ABS-CBN) – 8.6%


1. Pilipinas Got Talent (ABS-CBN) – 39.1%
2. Rated K (ABS-CBN) – 34.3%
3. Goin’ Bulilit (ABS-CBN) – 29.4%
4. Sharon (ABS-CBN) – 25.5%
5. TV Patrol Linggo (GMA-7) – 23.3%
6. 24 Oras Weekend (GMA-7) – 19.6%
7. Mel & Joey (GMA-7) – 16.9%
8. Show Me Da Manny (GMA-7) – 15.5%
9. Kap’s Amazing Stories (GMA-7) – 15.2%
10. Bandaoke (GMA-7) – 13.4%

March 8, Monday


1. Wowowee (ABS-CBN) – 21.6%
2. Eat Bulaga! (GMA-7) – 15.2%
3. You’re Mine Only Mine (ABS-CBN) – 14.5%
4. Magkano ang Iyong Dangal? (ABS-CBN) – 13.6%
5. 82nd Oscar Awards (ABS-CBN) – 13.2%
6. Banana Split Daily Servings (ABS-CBN) – 10.9%
7. Pilipinas Got More Talent (ABS-CBN) – 10.7%
8. Gumapang Ka Sa Lusak (GMA-7) – 10.3%
9. Daisy Siete: Baby & Me (ABS-CBN) – 10.2%
10. Ina, Kasusuklaman Ba Kita? (GMA-7) – 9.7%


1. Agua Bendita (ABS-CBN) – 39.2%
2. Kung Tayo’y Magkakalayo (ABS-CBN) – 35.1%
3. TV Patrol World (ABS-CBN) – 35%
4. Habang May Buhay (ABS-CBN) – 29.6%
5. Panday Kids (GMA-7) – 27.1%
6. Tanging Yaman (ABS-CBN) – 26.4%
7. The Last Prince (GMA-7) – 25.6%
8. Rubi (ABS-CBN) – 23.3%
9. 24 Oras (GMA-7) – 23.1%
10. Diva (GMA-7) – 21%

Source: TNS Ratings

Ewan ko na lang, I was on the verge throwing up as I got closer to the end of the list. As far as I am concerned, watching ABS-CBN/GMA 7 programming is cruel and inhuman punishment – it is plain torture and a violation of my human rights – LOL.

Notice the propensity of delusional telenovelas/soap operas, melodrama, lowest common denominator variety shows, and escapist slapstick comedy.

Really, Is this all we’ve got – escapist delusional fare?

Guess what happens Da Pinoy’s delusion-laden world view gets a taste of reality-based satire. Yup, get those wipes, sh*t will be all over the ceiling.

If we want to stop becoming the butt of jokes, we need to get our sh*t together, Philippines! I’m not joking.



  1. Nakakasuka ang mga palabas na nakalista. Puro basura ang nilalagay ng mga yun sa utak ng mga Pinoy kaya ayan, nananalo mga tulad ni Erap at Noynoy.

  2. Hi, BongV.

    Among the pieces spawned by the whole Adam Carolla affair, this is the one I liked the most. Mahirap naman kasi talaga comedy eh, kasi nga di lahat ng audience parehas. Aside pa dun, if we’re talking of the truth, it was also a case of shooting the messenger. Imagine if it was an authority figure who delivered the underlying message of the “joke”?

    On your comment sa TV programs:
    The prime time programming structure focuses on catching the attention of people just home from work — the pagod people. Kaya bad news muna tapos tadtad ka na ng escapist fare. Hahawakan talaga ang attention ng taong pagod. Bomb them with a lot advertising and brainless entertainment habang gulay pa utak nila, sweet! Swerte na lang yung taong nakatulog agad dahil sa pagod.

    Pero tingin ko talaga, Pinoys will be better off watching Spongebob Squarepants while chugging down a few cervezas rather than sit through the bad news and OA dramas. Di ba? Para chill lang sila at di highblood. LOL.

    Of course, kung ayaw natin talaga yung standard TV broadcast, mag cable na lang tayo para maraming pagpilian. 😀


    On the national B.O.: Mukhang mahirap maghanap ng deodorant strong enough for that kung built-in na yung amoy. Kailangan check ang diet and maligo palagi, useless kung purong deodorant lang.

  3. Magbiro ka na sa lasing, huwag lang sa mga mapupurol ang utak na hunghang (AKA = Pinoys).

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