The Aquino government is a glaring reflection of the intellectual and cultural bankruptcy of Philippine society.
The mediocrity of the thinking process used to select Aquino reverberates throughout Noynoy’s student government:
- Botched hostage taking
- Botched personnel memo
- Botched wangwang
- Sloppy HLI land reform law
- Idiotic confrontation with the Supreme Court
- Rewarding military adventurism and politicizing the AFP.
- The diplomatic ruckus from a juvenile tweet – the small things that make the biggest difference – anyone heard Pareto? Hello?
The two words that come to mind about the Aquino Student Government, the State Visit to Vietnam and how the international community looks at us Filipinos at this point… is….. LOSER and PIG. And that’s not to include the flippant SMILING DOG monicker from Hong Kong.
Mae Mislang’s tweet boils down to one thing – a lack of etiquette – http://hubpages.com/hub/Good-Houseguest-Etiquette-Dos-and-Donts – – “Chances are your hosts have gone out of their way to buy and make foods that they think would be enjoyable for the guests. And say thank you.
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Just got through reading this note on etiquette in the Philippines from the website – http://www.kwintessential.co.uk/resources/global-etiquette/philippines-country-profile.html
Filipino Society & Culture
Filipino Family Values
The family is the center of the social structure and includes the nuclear family, aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins and honorary relations such as godparents, sponsors, and close family friends. ( BV:It’s the Pinoy mafia.. DUH)
People get strength and stability from their family. As such, many children have several godparents. ( BV:It’s the Pinoy mafia.. DUH)
Concern for the extended family is seen in the patronage provided to family members when they seek employment. ( BV: NEPOTISMO, The meritocracy is damned)
It is common for members of the same family to work for the same company. ( BV: NEPOTISMO, The meritocracy is damned)
In fact, many collective bargaining agreements state that preferential hiring will be given to family members.( BV: NEPOTISMO, The meritocracy is damned)
Filipino Concept of Shame
- Hiya is shame and is a motivating factor behind behavior. ( BV: di na uso, pakapalan na ng mukha – look at Noynoy Aquino, Kris Aquino, Puno, and Mislang)
- It is a sense of social propriety and conforming to societal norms of behavior.
- Filipinos believe they must live up to the accepted standards of behavior and if they fail to do so they bring shame not only upon themselves, but also upon their family. ( BV: “Standards? What standards? How to be a pig?”)
- One indication of this might be a willingness to spend more than they can afford on a party rather than be shamed by their economic circumstances. ( BV: Yabang, tikal, hambugero, paporma)
- If someone is publicly embarrassed, criticized, or does not live up to expectations, they feel shame and lose self-esteem. ( BV: Ewan ko, Pinoy politicians seem to have a hide thicker than a rhinoceros or an Abrams Tank)
Etiquette & Customs
- Initial greetings are formal and follow a set protocol of greeting the eldest or most important person first.
- A handshake, with a welcoming smile, is the standard greeting.
- Close female friends may hug and kiss when they meet.
- Use academic, professional, or honorific titles and the person’s surname until you are invited to use their first name, or even more frequently, their nickname.
Gift Giving Etiquette
- If you are invited to a Filipino home for dinner bring sweets or flowers to the hosts.
- If you give flowers, avoid chrysanthemums and white lilies. (BV: Those are used for funerals!!! )
- You may send a fruit basket after the event as a thank you but not before or at the event, as it could be interpreted as meaning you do not think that the host will provide sufficient hospitality.
- Wrap gifts elegantly as presentation is important.
- There are no colour restrictions as to wrapping paper.
- Gifts are not opened when received.
- If you are invited to a Filipino’s house:.
- It is best to arrive 15 to 30 minutes later than invited for a large party. ( BV: Proverbial island time)
- Never refer to your host’s wife as the hostess. This has a different meaning in the Philippines. ( BV: In the Philippines, hostess means a hooker )
- Dress well. Appearances matter and you will be judged on how you dress. ( BV: Clothes make the man until you see the Aquinos all in yellow ala Tweetie bird )
- Compliment the hostess on the house. Send a handwritten thank you note to the hosts in the week following the dinner or party. It shows you have class. ( BV: Even by effed up Pinoy standards, Mislang had the nerve – I told ya it’s the Tarlac hillbillies, them varmints are riding tweeter and facebook pardner.. yeeehaw)
- Wait to be asked several times before moving into the dining room or helping yourself to food.
- Wait to be told where to sit. There may be a seating plan.
- Do not start eating until the host invites you to do so.
- Meals are often served family- style or are buffets where you serve yourself.
- A fork and spoon are the typical eating utensils. Hold the fork in the left hand and use it to guide food to the spoon in your right hand.
- Whether you should leave some food on your plate or finish everything is a matter of personal preference rather than culture-driven.
Business Etiquette & Protocol (BV: This is the good stuff – somebody say MICROMANAGEMENT)
Relationships & Communication
- Filipinos thrive on interpersonal relationships, so it is advisable to be introduced by a third party. ( BV: It’s called Padrino)
- It is crucial to network and build up a cadre of business associates you can call upon for assistance in the future.( BV: Kamag-anak, kaklase, kabarkada – KKK)
- Business relationships are personal relationships, which mean you may be asked to do favors for colleagues, and they will fully expect you to ask them for favors in return. ( BV: The problem is when the favors include being a pimp, being a transporter of contraband, and a facilitator of bribes)
- Once a relationship has been developed it is with you personally, not necessarily with the company you represent. Therefore, if you leave the company, your replacement will need to build their own relationship.
- Presenting the proper image will facilitate building business relationships. Dress conservatively and well at all times.
Business Meeting Etiquette
- Appointments are required and should be made 3 to 4 weeks in advance. ( BV: And then they disappear into a black hole tow or three days before the confirmed appointment)
- It is a good idea to reconfirm a few days prior to the meeting, as situations may change. ( BV: Indyanan blues)
- Avoid scheduling meetings the week before Easter. (BV: We take vacations the week before Easter – one of our many Catholic perks – and yes – those are paid holidays – one week)
- Punctuality is expected. For the most part your Filipino colleagues will be punctual as well. (BV: “For the most part” is defined as 30%.)
- Face-to-face meetings are preferred to other, more impersonal methods such as the telephone, fax, letter or email. (BV: That’s because they can’t ask favors – like a movie ticket, plane ticket, hotel accommodations, car rentals – or, you don’t get to bid for the business. The favors just the entrance fee – pay to play. You actually win when you talk “WHAT’S IN IT FOR THEM”)
- Send an agenda and informational materials in advance of the meeting so your colleagues may prepare for the discussion.(BV: Provide the rates in advance so they can advice you how much to jack up. Remember, you are in competition – if they don’t have a cut – your a dead duck. Don’t worry about the final expense – they will approve the bid anyways. Go with the flow.)
- The actual decision maker may not be at the meeting. ( BV: What’s the point in having the meeting? Because all the godfather’s lieutenants will negotiate their share of the pie – just say yes and it will be smooth sailing all the way)
- Avoid making exaggerated claims. (BV: Claims such as “let’s save the taxpayers money” are exaggerated and will never be allowed to participate in the bidding process.)
- Always accept any offer of food or drink. If you turn down offers of hospitality, your colleagues lose face. ( BV: They’d rather lose revenue than lose “face”.. DUMBASSES)
- It is important to remain for the period of social conversation at the end of the meeting. (BV: That’s when they ask you to go “get some”.. .. poonani… you know.)
- You may never actually meet with the decision maker or it may take several visits to do so. (BV: That’s because he is so full of himself and what’s to remind you that you don’t mean jacksh*t – the way to get to the decision maker is through a padrino – or to meet him in the golf course, the sabungan, or the hotel lounges, karaoke)
- Decisions are made at the top of the company. (BV: Micromanagement par excellence. )
- Filipinos avoid confrontation if at all possible. It is difficult for them to say ‘no’. Likewise, their ‘yes’ may merely mean ‘perhaps’. (BV: That’s being a weasel – just making sure their asses don’t get busted or held accountable)
- At each stage of the negotiation, try to get agreements in writing to avoid confusion or misinterpretation. (BV: Yup, that’s called a CYA – Cover Your Ass documentation – in case they start twisting the story and start spewing crap.)
- If you raise your voice or lose your temper, you lose face.(BV: Talo ang pikon – refrain from ad hominems – keep on reading ANTIPINOY.COM.. lol )
- Filipinos do business with people more than companies. If you change representatives during negotiations, you may have to start over. (BV: That’s because the new dude can be greedier or just wants different sh*t – a new club, a new GRO, a new johnny Walker, etc)
- Negotiations may be relatively slow. Most processes take a long time because group consensus is necessary. (BV: Speed it up by telling the group – here’s how much each of you will make if this gets done – straight up you’ll get an approval.)
- Decisions are often reached on the basis of feelings rather than facts, which is why it is imperative to develop a broad network of personal relationships. (BV: You have to become a pandering sonnovabitch – salesmanship at its most primeval – Pinoys are still human after all – lol)
- Do not remove your suit jacket unless the most important Filipino does.
- Business attire is conservative.
- Men should wear a dark colored, conservative business suit, at least for the initial meeting.
- Women should wear a conservative suit, a skirt and blouse, or a dress.
- Women’s clothing may be brightly colored as long as it is of good quality and well tailored.
- Appearances matter and visitors should dress well. (BV That’s how idiots become presidents in the Philippines – it’s an idiocracy:)
- You should offer your business card first.
- Make sure your business card includes your title.
- Present and receive business cards with two hands so that it is readable to the recipient.
- Examine the card briefly before putting it in your business card case.
- Some senior level executives only give business cards to those of similar rank.
Rules of etiquette
Rules of etiquette encompass most aspects of social interaction in any society, though the term itself is not commonly used. A rule of etiquette may reflect an underlying ethical code, or it may reflect a person’s fashion or status. Rules of etiquette are usually unwritten, but aspects of etiquette have been codified from time to time.
“Etiquette tells one which fork to use. Manners tells one what to do when your neighbor doesn’t”
Manners involve a wide range of social interactions within cultural norms as in the “comedy of manners”, or a painter’s characteristic “manner”. Etiquette and manners, like mythology, have buried histories especially when they seem to have little obvious purpose, and their justifications as logical (“respect shown to others” etc.) may be equally revealing to the social historian.
Etiquette in North America
In the United States, the notion of etiquette, being of French origin and arising from practices at the court of Louis XIV, is occasionally disparaged, especially by those unfamiliar with etiquette’s social foundations and functions, as old-fashioned or elite, a code concerned only with apparently remote directives such as “which fork to use”.
Some such individuals consider etiquette to be an unnecessary restriction of freedom of personal expression; others consider such a philosophy to be espoused only by the unschooled, the unmannerly and the rude.
For instance, wearing pajamas to a wedding in a cathedral may indeed be an expression of the guest’s freedom, but also may cause the bride and groom to suspect that the guest in pajamas is expressing amusement, disparagement, or disrespect towards them and their wedding.
Etiquette may be enforced in pragmatic ways: “No shoes, no shirt, no service” is a notice commonly displayed outside stores and cafés in the warmer parts of North America. Others feel that a single, basic code shared by all makes life simpler and more pleasant by removing many chances for misunderstandings and by creating opportunities for courtesy and mutual respect.
Pinoy etiquette, just like Pinoy culture – is evolving. The upside to the Mislang incident, perhaps, is our greater awareness that such behavior is not acceptable when building bridges and respect between two sovereign nations.
Didn’t you notice how for the most part – Da Pinoy’s self-esteem is tied to emotion-centric group approval – feelings – not facts – emo politics, emo business? If we do business like infants – we will be slaughtered in the global market. Grow up!
Impunity apparently isn’t a monopoly of the Ampatuans. Impunity, bahala na, incompetence stem from this archetype of “the common tao”. We don’t need the common tao in this uncommon times – we need an uncommon tao with common sense – lots of em.